Reed the Viking

100th Post!

Today marks my 100th post, a very important benchmark for a super serious blogger like myself. I should be getting a book deal soon, right? Somebody pay me damnit! So that's not the only recent bench mark in my life. Last week, and I forgot to mention it on my blog because it was on the weekend, was the 2nd year mark of my navy career. This is important for two reasons:

1.  It's a nice count-down reminder of how much time I have left.
2. Pay raise!!!

You'd think I have something special planned for today's post, but I don't.

If there's one link you click on today, make it this one. VDH wrote an excellent post about the Obama administration's Animal Farm. I don't think it could be put any better than that, and quite frankly, I'm jealous that I didn't write it. Curse you, VDH!!!! CURSE YOU!!!!!!

Some discouraging, perhaps even worrying news from Turkey. How long can they remain a secular democracy? Scary question...

More troubling Turkey news: Big Contributions From Iran.

According to this report, I should be excellent at quick decision making. I don't think I'm good enough, maybe I should play more Counterstrike. Let's see if I can convince the Navy that we should have annual Halo training for 4 weeks.

When you've lost John Stewart... Dems are in deep trouble in November, lucky for them it's not 2012.

How to concede election results with grace. Would that more losers act this way, sportsmanship seems very underrated these days.

Daily dose of Paul Ryan.

Daily dose of Chris Christie.

WaPo hackery: Extending Bush Tax Cuts Would Deprive Government of $4 Trillion. Ed explains the hackery, but the short of it is that keeping the status quo doesn't deprive the government of anything, but raising taxes would increase tax intake by $4 trillion. The way they write it, it's like we owe them that money of ours (well, we do). I pay them quite enough, thanks.

Yesterday I read about a big announcement that would excite Democrats around the nation. This announcement, I read, was to be announced on the 15th of September by Tim Kaine. Allah had some interesting and hilarious hunches about what the announcement might be, and he wasn't far off, but he was ultimately wrong. If you click the link, and follow his link to the new "car metaphor," you are liable to laugh. It was Glenn and his readers, however, who had my favorite reaction to the big news today.

“It’s no fun when they are so easy. How long before that logo shows up with a red cross bar running from 10 to 4?”

If I were worth a damn at photoshop, I'd have been all over that hours ago. Good thing I've got MS Paint! Done and done.

 Artist Behind Everybody Draw Mohammud Day Forced to Change Identity. I have little sympathy for her, especially because she chickened out and apologized after it caught on. The real reason I have no sympathy for her is because I, Reed the motherfucking Viking, created Everybody Draw Mohammud Day first! I created it the day the South Park episode 201 aired. I got no credit because nobody reads my blog, but damnit I thought of it first, I should be the one with the death threats! I'm trying so damn hard here, somebody notice me and threaten to kill me! I thought of wearing an outfit made from meat to try to provoke PETA, but unfortunately I'm a little late on that one... Allah also goes into why he supported EDM Day but not the Quran burning with pretty much the same reasoning that I use. The most important point is found here, which I pretty much 100% agree with:

"As I acknowledged during Koran-apalooza last week, it’s a fine line between Jones’s stunt (which I opposed) and “Everybody Draw Mohammed Day” (which I supported). One of the reasons I look dimly on dopey atheist gags like erecting “Secular Trees” next to Christmas trees on public squares is because the offense to Christians seems gratuitous. Sure, they’re making a point about religion in the process, but they’re doing it in a way that looks like mockery, calculated to annoy. They have the right, but why alienate people with a taunt? That’s what Jones’s stunt seemed like to me — not so much a message to jihadis, even though he tried to frame it that way at times, but something aimed at provoking all Muslims, a group that includes people like Zuhdi Jasser. EDM Day wasn’t aimed at all Muslims, though. Some moderates were bound to take offense, but the point of the day was to push back against the sort of jihadis who’ve now forced Norris into hiding. Intent and intimidation do count here; if Christian fundies were threatening to kill atheists over “Secular Trees,” my calculations would change accordingly. But either way, there simplymust be space for this sort of offense in public debate. I’m open to drawing the line in a slightly different place, but the line has to be drawn somewhere."

Well said, Allah.

Glenn also linked to that story on Instapundit, and his comment goes back to what I was saying yesterday about the victim being blamed for the violent offender's actions.

"Blaming the victim is what people do, when they’re scared and don’t want to do anything about what’s scaring them."

True words right there. 

Hot Mexican Chick in Tight Clothes Gets Cat-Called in Locker Room. Really? This is a news story? There's nothing more dog bites man than this. 2+2 = 4, and smoking hot women in flattering outfits who walk into a locker room are going to get attention for their looks. Normally I'd ignore this retarded "story," but it's about my Jets (who suck, but whatever) so I felt compelled to comment. Lori Ziganto does a good job with this one, so just click the link and read her perspective. This really was just an excuse to post a picture of a hot chick.

 Men can't be men anymore in this country apparently, not even in the NFL. Next thing you know, they'll be sitting next to Tiger being treated for their sex addictions.

Jonah Goldberg revisits some excellent libertarian concepts. I've argued on the blog that a market economy is cooperative and fairer than a "fair" and "planned" economy. The biggest takeaway from this article, for me, was the concepts explored in "I, Pencil." You don't know how to make a pencil, and not even a pencil expert could do it himself nor could he know the immediate needs at every level in the process in a timely manner. I don't care how many Ivy League degrees you have, or how many Nobel Prizes you've won, a centralized body will not be as well equipped to deal with the issues at hand as the people who are actually affected. Not to mention the law of unintended consequences that comes into play every time new legislation passes (did somebody say higher insurance premiums?).

My father wrote about the law of unintended consequences today. Environmentalists know that bikes are better for the environment than cars, so as logic dictates, biking to work should be incentivized, right? Cue the law of unintended consequences: 

"The City took away one traffic lane and two parking spots and now has cars oddly placed in the middle of the street.  During periods of usual traffic, the loss of one lane increases transit time significantly.  Traffic never moves fast in New York (though the recession has helpfully cut the number of cars driving in the City; perhaps the Democrats can use that as evidence for the silver lining of their economic policies?)  Here is the conundrum for the Bloomberg administration, as it increasingly attempts to micromanage the behavior of New Yorkers: although their desire to save the planet and protect the health of New Yorkers is admirable, (it is for our own good, after all) they have neglected to factor in the unintended consequences of their policies.  For example, of the number of people who travel up First Avenue everyday, less than 1% are riding bikes.  If the bike lane causes increased congestion (which it does) then the net benefit on our carbon footprint will go up, rather than down.  Furthermore, the loss of parking spaces on the street means people will have to use parking garages more often (which increases the city's coffers by virtue of their 18.5% tax on their ridiculously high fees) which increases the cost of doing business in New York.  A not insignificant number of tax paying commuters will conclude, as all the costs of living and working in New York increase (again, the cost of food, clothing, and all other necessities goes up when the city makes it more costly to move around), that doing business in New York is just not worth the expense and the inconvenience.  Thus, our Mayor's desire, admirable as it is, to control every aspect of life in the Big City, will lead to a deterioration of life in the Big City. "

He also waxes poetic towards the end of his post, with a funny take on a poem about the Holocaust (Funny? Holocaust? You're sick Reed). Also it's a good post because he linked to me, thanks Dad.

One of my favorite blogs, Are We Lumberjacks, made me piss my pants with this one today.

 

We're in a Depression, Will Healthcare Provide Free Zoloft?

One of my best friends, college graduate Dreidel Bagelwicz (he's Joooooish), is somewhat interested in going into law. He works as a paralegal at the moment, and he told me he might apply for law school in the upcoming years. I told him that I'd read a lot on the depression of the law industry, and how law students were suing (typical) their schools for fudging numbers on their employability estimates. Put simply, law graduates are having trouble getting jobs these days. He said he knew of the situation, and that was the end of the conversation. Well, Dreidel, if you're reading this, I have great news for you! You DO have job opportunities after law school! True, those lucky students go to UCLA which is ranked 15, but still I do believe there is hope for you. One day, you too may be able to drive some old guy's lexus around some traffic jam.

It'd be fun to be a chauffer... if you got to use this car. DIY: Students build an electric car that passes 300 mp/h. Those bastards better be careful, we all know the dangers of going super-sonic and entering the 8th dimension. I mean, Dr. Lizardo and Buckaroo Bonzai showed us the very real dangers of that sort of travel. Lord John Whorfin is not to be trifled with.

Google, like alcohol and duct tape, can pretty much do anything. Google launches new program to allow you to make free domestic calls from your computer. International calls cost about $0.02 a minute. Cool stuff, too bad I don't trust Google as far as I can throw them (trick statement: You can't throw something that's everyhere).

iPhone, like google, duct tape and alcohol can pretty much do anything. Couple uses iPhone to thwart robbery in their home from 1400 miles away on vacation. Pretty cool, but to be honest, this is sort of old news. Over 4 years ago I installed a little program on my laptop that was an alarm. When activated, any person who did not properly de-activate it would set off the alarm, which would simultaneously take a picture through the webcam and send an email with the picture attached to my personal email. I love the future.

Economist: Good news, we're officially in a depression. Well, there's two ways to go when you hit rock bottom... up, or suicide. My bet: the American economy doesn't have the balls to commit suicide. Pussy! Chicken! Yeah, you're such a failure you can't even kill yourself. Seriously, that's how you're supposed to talk to depressed, suicidal people. They react terribly to compassion, you must goad them, because if they're all emo, they def don't have the balls to off themselves. Trust me, the Navy makes us do suicide prevention training a few times a year, I'm basically like a black-belt in suicide prevention.

Why Hollywood loves liberalism, explained. Pretty standard fare, although I do think this is a noteworthy quote: "As Nozick said, “a capitalist society rewards people only insofar as they serve the market-expressed desires of others; it rewards in accordance with economic contribution, not in accordance with personal value.” This might seem counter-intuitive but, if you think about it, a system that rewards individuals for improving the lot of others is far fairer than one that rewards them for some arbitrary intrinsic quality." Uh oh... the author of that article made capitalism sound fair, I don't like it any more!

Ulysses: Not just unreadable James Joyce garbage, but a real, living man? Ok, so I've never read Joyce's Ullyses, but I have read Dubliners and I rather liked it. Homer's Odyssey was one of the first books I ever read (well, my dad read it to me). I always liked when he tricks the cyclops and calls himself "No man" but then, in a showcase of textbook hubris, he reveals his identity.

Question of the day (H/T: Hotair): Is it simply British to 'get smashed'?

This is why teacher tenure needs to go... Unbelievable: Teacher assigns class project where they plan a terror attack. Well, I took forensics and I have a great assignment for her students as well. I'd like them to plan a murder, and the person who's plan has the least risk of getting caught will be picked for the follow up assignment :). Hint: the target is female and Australian, working as a teacher. Good luck!

Obama Inflatable Sex Doll on sale in Asia. There are pictures up if you follow the link. Wow, just wow. Maybe they got their inspiration from this? I mean, Superman is the protector of the human race, let's take it one step further and make a doll of the protector of te entire planet! Oceans will rises, babies will cease to cry, yes we can!

I didn't write about it when it happened, because I didn't care much and I didn't think you all would care either, but there was a time when a lot of violence was being blamed on tea-bag hers (I did write about that). A census worker's suicide was blamed on the political right and used as proof of escalating wingnuttery. On the right, they're still waiting for apologies, aren't they. Well they were also blaming the firebombing of Rep. Russ Carnahan's campaign office on righties, which I found to be more feasable but without proof, it's just demagogery. Turns out the culprit was a lefty and former staffer to Carnahan. So when a muslim cab driver in NY was brutally attacked recently, of course the left practiced some restraint until the facts cleared up. Who am I kidding, the usual suspects jumped on "islamaphobia" on the right contributing to the attack, when the police confirm it was a man who works for Park 51, the group involved with the mosque near ground zero. Glenn's got the scoop in the same link above, as does the blog American Power (sorta a redundant name, I think... let's take it one step furter. Male American Power, booyah suck it feminists!).

Allah introduces us to a new hilarious political candidate, who as he notes, doesn't fit in the same category as Basil Marceaux or Alvin Greene perhaps. Read the link above to get some better commentary, but watch the video and see for yourself what kinda guy we're dealing with here. Fine, I know you people hate clicking links so I'll provide an excerpt. "He looks a bit like Chris Farley, he sounds a bit like Jack Black, but the magic is all his own, my friends."

That'll do it for me today. If you look over to the right side of the blog, you'll see my twitter feed is embedded, feel free to follow me on twitter if you'd like. I'm moving into my new place tomorrow, and it'll be a week or two before I have internet at home, but I should be able to continue posting as normal by either stealing internet from a neighbor, or going to a starbucks as a last resort. Either way, I should be blogging, but don't boycott me if I don't, I love your sweet, sweet traffic.

Print Me A Steak, Rare, With a Side of Mashed Taters

I wrote about NASA's new mission a few days ago (Muslim outreach if you don't recall) and I have some images of their newest photos that you can find here. I'll post the first one for you to get a taste of what the new NASA mission looks like.

I especially think that last one will soften their hearts, or unclench their fists as Obama would say. People love it when you compliment their cooking, so good job NASA!

Whenever I go home on leave, the popular line of the vacation goes something like this, "Dude, whatdya mean there's a 15 minute wait for a table? You're a fucking hero man!" My friends like to use the tongue-in-cheek "You're a hero" line all the time, and to be honest I started referring to myself as a hero or national treasure. It's funny to say, especially given that I was still in training when they started calling me a hero, but we all used appropriate dosage of sarcasm and of course, I don't actually think I'm a hero (but heroes never do, do they?). Why am I bringing this up? Some asshat retired Lt. Col. at the LA Times wrote an article headlined: Every soldier a hero? Hardly. I'm tempted to stay silent on this, as he only mentions soldiers (i.e., ARMY) but I assume he's just using a blanket term and means anybody in the U.S. Armed Services. I understand where the retired Lt. Col. is coming from, I really do. I know plenty of shitbags in the service who fuck around and don't give a rip about Alabama the U.S.. Personally, part of the reason I joined the service was for personal gain; The Navy would give me something I wanted (a job, training, education) and in return, I'd trade in 6 years of my life for them to do whatever the hell they want with. I still think I made the right decision, it was a fair trade, and though I'm not sure I'll re-enlist, the possibility exists for sure. So am I a hero? I don't think so. But what sir seems to gloss over is that when it comes down to it, everybody in the service is there because they volunteered, and maybe it's not a sacrifice for officers like him (but I do believe officers sacrifice at least as much), but it counts for something. Suppose you're a supply officer and your specialty is budgeting for the chow-hall. Shit hits the fan, you're still going to get a rifle and going to fight, whether you believe in the war or not. What I'm saying is not that everybody in the military is a hero, because that'd be false. What I am saying is that I find nothing objectionable about civilians regarding the military as a heroic institution, full of brave young men and women. Because as we say in the military, "perception is reality."

In related news, the Washington Times poses the important questions: Will fart fiction gets boys to read? If the Washington Times read my blog, they'd have seen the tattoo that I posted yesterday proclaiming reeding to be faggotry.

Welcome to the future: Digital Food Printer Creates Nutritious Meals. I wonder, will it be able to make a sandwich on nice Italian bread with prosciutto di parma, fresh mozzarella, roasted red peppers, balsamic vinaigrette, and perhaps some assorted greens? If it can't do that, I don't have much use for it. On the serious, while that machine sounds pretty cool, I enjoy cooking as a hobby so I'm not sure it'll ever completely replace me in the kitchen, although I am lazy to cook sometimes...

I don't recall if I ever wrote about Alvin Greene in the past, but I'm sure some of you have heard of him by now. He's the democratic senate candidate in S.C. that nobody had heard of until he unexpectedly won the democratic primary. I haven't written about him, mostly because it's too easy, but also because I think it's a little sad and I feel bad for the guy. I mean, he seems genuinely mentally retarded, and I don't mean that in the, "Hey, quit being retarded" derogatory sense of the word. I mean I think he's actually got mental problems, mainly retardation. Like most retards (see Sean Penn, I Am Sam), he provides endless wells of humor, but like I said, I'd feel bad making fun of him for it. When I read about him today, however, I knew that I finally had to write about it. This is because he said he didn't get promoted because, and I quote, "I’m telling you who they promote: the terrorists and the communists. This is why we need to overhaul the military and get these people out." To which Allah hilariously wrote, "Which, of course, is a vile lie. It’s only terrorists who occasionally get promoted." Alvin Greene sounds like me, and for that he gets my blogs official endorsement. Also, he showed porn to an 18 year old girl on a college campus and lives with his parents. Can't help but love the guy, he really is awesome and amusing to no end.

Lefties and terrizts Archaeologists continue to use flag feature to silence dissent. This is just another example of a common tactic used against right-leaning blogs where people who disagree with the blogs will flag them for inappropriate content. Google and Youtube both have automated systems that take down the content once it's been flagged and thus, the content is squashed at least temporarily. At the same time as this happens, blogs and videos by literal terrizt groups are open and hosted just fine on youtube and google. Put simply: If you host a video condemning radical islamic terrizm archaeology, your video will be taken down for offensive content, but if you show literal beheadings and attacks on Americans and Israelis, you are left alone. If you don't believe me, feel free to take a look at the two videos at the bottom of the page I just linked to. I am not a fan of Michelle Malkin, but there's no doubt she's right in this case; watch the videos yourself.

Speaking of censorship, the most depraved example I have ever seen of censorship is being employed in Palestine against the legendary Euro-disco group, Boney M. You know, the ones that sing "Daddy Cool" and "The Rivers of Babylon" which was covered by Sublime. Well looks like they won't be singing "The Rivers of Babylon" in Ramallah, for fear of offending the archaeology loving people of the West Bank. Note: Boney M. isn't censoring themselves, they were asked by management NOT to sing the song and they are disappointed by that decision.

And you thought craigslist was just for the hookers in casual encounters: Patient, resourceful 17 year old makes only 14 trades on craigslist to acquire a Porsche.

Worst 11 Year Old Evah?: Jessica Slaughter uses language that the 10 year old from Kick-Ass would be shocked by (not really though). Actually, they're about on par, only that one is fictional and the other is real. The first link is the original video, here comes the good stuff with her dad who looks like Sam Elliot but sounds like Randy Savage threatening the haters. From the dad, "Consequences will never be the same!" What does that even mean?

Do Japanese and Korean robots have slanty eyes and can they pronounce the letter L? I ask this because 'Mrrkin robots do not exist in the same capacity, sadly. Maybe we don't build robots like they do because we're tired of fighting them after the war in the Matrix and the Terminator series...

Some Jew reminds followers of the Sherrod case of the importance of reading. I still feel a little bit used and misled by Andrew Breitbart and his video of Sherrod speaking to the NAACP, but perhaps it's my own fault for being misled. Apparently, the article he wrote that accompanied the video did not focus on Sherrod, nor call for her to be punished. Rather, the focus was on the audience who seemingly agreed with her past racist actions. Point well taken, Jew, but I still feel used.

I appreciate comments in the comments section. I know lots of random people read this, because sometimes somebody I haven't seen in ages will talk to me and remark on how they liked a post. Don't be shy with the comments section, comments are appreciated. Alright, well I'd write more, but looking at my traffic over the last few days, I have realized that you all don't give a rip about what I write, you just check in whenever I have pictures of hotties in bikinis... I guess I'll indulge you all, spoiled punks.

Hell yeah, 'Mrrrka! YEEEEEHAW! 

There is a G-d, and He Likes Boobs and Booze

Best day evah? Maybe not, but best 3 news items evah for sure.

There is a G-d: Female breasts are getting bigger! Heres a picture to prove it (Yes, that's Yolanda, Saffron, Bridget, or that chick from Mad Men if you don't watch Firefly).

 

The aforementioned G-d also likes to party: Alcohol is healthy for you!

The Chosen People: Jews have 20% more sex than Catholics and Protestants, booyah! Also, alcoholics (aka healthy people, see above link) get laid a lot more than people who don't drink.

The Chosen People? Maybe chosen to be hated and killed... Lee Smith writes on Mainstreaming Hate, which refers more specifically to the mainstreaming of anti-semitism. It rolls around every so often, the naive gunless jews with poor memories usually get murdered, and the smart ones live on to make the race more pure and intelligent. JEW POWER! Sorry, I got a little overboard there, you gentiles are cool, srsly. I am not a jewish supremacist, but no for real we're chosen, suck it.

I wrote about how I think racism is bad, and Greg Gutfeld of Redeye offers his input (sounds pretty ridiculous after I literally just wrote, "JEW POWER" and told non-jews to suck it, but my tongue was firmly in my cheek and I think you all know). He says a lot of what I said yesterday, mostly, and his post is brief and humorous, so check it out. The better post about the whole NAACP thing is by Cornell Law Prof. William Jacobson of "Legal Insurrection." Prof. Jacobson says:

"In context, Sherrod at worst was a former racist who had realized the error of her ways... Media Matters and Think Progress, the ultimate out-of-context word and phrase manipulators, are hot on the case because Shirley Sherrod was taken out of context.

So how about some context for the handful (out of many millions) of people who have attended Tea Party rallies carrying racist signs?

How about considering that some of the people were not really Tea Party supporters but plants by the opposition designed to create controversy? Or that some of the photos were not even at Tea Party rallies? Or that some of the people were kicked out of the Tea Party movement? Or that some of the accusations of racist words being shouted are denied and the videos show otherwise? Or that numerous blacks who are active in the Tea Party movement deny that there is widespread racism? Or that the Tea Party philosophy of limited government and free enterprise is completely race neutral?"

The other day on the news, the anchor was talking about the Tea Party being racist, and used posters of Obama with the Hitler mustache as proof. Those posters are obviously retarded and historically illiterate, but more incredibly, I was shocked at the scientific breakthrough that I have never heard of til just that day. Apparently, this anchor had warped through the time-space continuum and jumped into the future, completely missing 8 years of Bushitler displays around the country. A quick google search would bring her up to date, and I literally just clicked the first link to find a decent record of some high profile Bushitler peeps. BTW, that site only goes up to 2005, so keep that in mind as well. Comparing Obama to Hitler is not racist, it's just retarded.

Comparing Obama to Bush is bad (for Obama fans) because generally, Obama has been worse than Bush on the few things Bush actually did well, for example as the NYT (?!?!!! THE NYT!) points out, Bush was awesome on AIDS relief in Africa. Things that Bush did bad, on the other hand, are consistently continued by Obama, or even escalated (see government ordered hit on U.S. citizen). Still waiting for DADT to get repealed so I can come out of the closet (just kidding, Mom). Too bad Obama's worse for gay rights than Dick Cheney. Then again, why should Obama throw them a bone when the gay community is tucked into his pocket, or at least the pocket of the democrat identity politicians. Obama's way worse on spending than the terrible Republicans were while Bush was in office, but let's not quickly forget how terrible they were. 

If you didn't think the prospect of drowning sucks enough as it is, after reading this you'll really be terrified. Drowning and suffocating are two of the scariest things to me, but then again it doesn't take much to scare me (moths, scary movies, no lights on at night, garages, basements, nighttime, Carrot Top).

A Word of Thanks to Four Black Men and a Gun... awesome article by Marcus Cole, a black guy from the hood who moved to a white neighborhood and had REAL racists act violently towards his family. His father and he understand that the cops aren't always there to save you, that the government can't be there 24/7 to ensure your safety, and that the second amendment is an invaluable right that offers the freedom to defend oneself. Law enforcement, is generally a necessary force for good that does a lot of work to protect the safety of our countrymen, but reality dictates that they are not superhuman defenders, and there sometimes is a need to defend oneself when the cops can't be there. 

Terrizt Archaeologist who threatened the South Park creators arrested on terrorism charges. What a jerk.. these guys are serious, and they want to harm us, it's not harmless, cute, jihad talk.

Some more Journolist stuff:

• Journolisters call Tea Party fascist, then propose idea to have the government force Fox News to stop broadcasting... the irony apparently goes over their heads. More historical illiteracy I guess.
• Ed Morrissey provides his input on the above mentioned, and I think he puts it well.
• Glenn has more at Instapundit.
• Journolister wishes death upon Rush Limbaugh, says if she saw him having a heart attack she'd stand by watching and laughing. Rush responds.

Mediocre British chick (I give her 5 out of 10, and pretty much any girl who's not obese gets that these days) publicly announces that she's the largest whore of all time (I think empowered is the term she used), likely has diseases. The money quote: "Now all I want to do is settle down. I just hope I haven't put men off." Aww, don't worry babe, I'm sure there's some guy out there that wants Syphilis; perhaps some die-hard Al Capone impersonator...

Reader and BFF Guiseppe Fratelli sent me this picture of the tattoo I should get (it even has my name in it!). Whatdy'all think? Is it 'Mrrrkin enough for me?

 

Although reeding is for faggots, you're not gay if you reed my site, because it's not a book, and the truth is that books are for nerds, my site is cool.

Playboy Officially SFW, Navy Expected to See Drop in Productivity

To start things off, I owe that woman from the NAACP an apology it seems. The video I saw seemed pretty damning, but upon checking out the full clip, it seems that I was a little misled. She went further in the full video to explain that she learned that her job isn't about helping somebody based on race, but by helping somebody based on his or her needs. So yeah, I jumped the gun, my bad.

Second: Posting that picture of the scantily clad beauty netted me a ton of hits, so in response, I'm going to have to keep that idea going.

Mmmm, enjoy... I hope you've eaten before seeing this.

REPRESENT! I saw this article today and thought it was actually going to be about coyotes (it sorta is) complete with pictures of cute little puppies and such, but then I started reading and saw that it mentioned the place I grew up, Westchester County, NY. I was visiting on leave when the coyote incidents took place (at least one of them). Aside from being predisposed to liking the article due to it refering to my home and talking about animals, I actually read the whole thing and found it to be a great read. It's not just about guns (which I also love), but freedom and all other sorts of 'Mrrkin shit (Lunch buffet at the titty bar not included). I wanted to pick out some quotes, but there were too many and I think it's worth reading in it's entirety.

Bombshell study: Free markets lead to fairer wages. 

Progress: Playboy now has SFW website so you can browse on the job! Nothing about the navy declining in productivity, just an educated guess...

Glenn Reynolds' monthly Popular Mechanics article is out and focuses on the war against photography. I'm not sure how much any of my readers know about this, so this is probably a good starting off point. I'll give a brief little intro: Basically, some events such as on-duty cops arresting bystanders for videotaping said cops in public places are taking place. Also, two reporters were banned from using the metro in some city (excuse my forgetfulness) for videotaping or something like that. Reason.com has been covering it a lot, I sometimes read about it, maybe I'm doing myself a disservice by maintaining an apathetic stance on the issue, but I guess I consider it a minor concern. I guess I'm just jaded.

Religion of peace poop? Muslims get the OK to drink shitty coffee (pun intended).

To quote a famous Briton, "Mother should I trust the Government?" If this is where they get their facts, then hell no. That girl grinding her ass on that pole - that girl is somebody's daughter. Then again, she does need your help to pay for med school.

I'm sure most of you haven't heard of the whole Journolist thing, and I don't recall writing anything about it when the story first blew up on the blogs. Brief sum-up: There's a private server with 400 or so (mostly openly liberal) journalists who have to be invited to the group to become a member. A vengeful or perhaps frustrated member of the list decided to publish some of the archives, namely ones written by WaPo's conservative beat writer Dave Weigel, which in turn exposed that he was a terrible choice for reporting the conservative beat, and seemed to resent those who he covered.  I'm not going to provide links, you all can go look it up yourself if you want to read more about that. The more scandalous part of the story was that it seemed like the group was intentionally trying to spin stories or silence stories from emerging into the national media spotlight, which is indeed dishonest, but I thought that those charges were a bit dubious at the time. Now some more journalist stuff has been leaked, and some of it is pretty damning. Below I will link to some good reading and reactions to the story.

Some background info on what was leaked found here at Instapundit.

Reactions to the story from both right and left found here.

To be continued? Tune in tomorrow to find out.

I think some of the charges are still dubious; I don't think there's a liberal conspiracy in the media to hide stories that are harmful to the democrat agenda and intentionally overblow stories that are harmful to conservatives. But like Glenn said, keep this in mind the next time they try to tell you that people who oppose the policies of our president are racists. Racism used to be a hefty charge, but the way it gets thrown around today really robs it of it's meaning. It's shameful that a group of professional journalists would actually say things like:

"Pick one of Obama’s conservative critics, [Spencer] Ackerman  wrote, “Fred Barnes, Karl Rove, who cares — and call them racists.”

Disgusting. Have your differences with Karl Rove, Fred Barnes, I do for sure. Call them racist if they're being racist, but the reckless abandon with which Ackerman weilds the race-club is reprehensible to say the least. Bolded by me for emphasis.

Courtesy of my father, who is a witch-doctor shrink psychiatrist, some psychiatric humor from the always impressive R. Lee Ermy.

And you really thought I punish you all with those fat women in bikinis? C'mon, you know I love you guys, enjoy this broad and have a nice night!

This Post Contains a Scantily Clad Beauty

Footage of evil Jooooooos torturing poor Gazan's found here. The horror! The horror! On a serious note, I know they get a lot of shit that sucks, and I'm not trying to downplay it, but c'mon, humanitarian crisis? If you truly care about people, start crying for the people of the Congo.

NAACP passes resolution condemning Tea Party for racism. Video of Tea Party racism found here. Oh? That's a Latino supremacist separatist group telling Whitey to go back to Europe, is it? I'm sorry, I meant this video of Tea Party racism found HERE... What do you mean that's video of an NAACP conference where the speaker on stage is openly admitting her racism and discriminatory acts against a white guy? There has to be SOME sort of video evidence of the widely recorded event the CBC claims took place at a Tea Party rally, where racial epithets were hurled at them and protesters spit on them as they passed, right? Well Andrew Breitbart offered an $100,000 donation to the United Negro College Fund if somebody could produce proof that this event ever happened and nobody has come forth with any evidence. Just so we've all got it straight, you can go out and call anybody racist with no proof, but when you challenge the claims, you need proof that it NEVER happened... interesting. Follow the link, Andrew holds up his claims using facts and video evidence from the event in question, or you could just take the CBC's word and label an entire group racist based on zero evidence. It's like Duke Lacrosse; you're guilty until proven innocent when you're up against these schmucks who'll use race to divide any issue. They told me if Obama was elected President, we'd have a post-racial America... oh well. Read the Breitbart article, it's enlightening for those who haven't been paying attention.

Instapundit notes that CBS was on the NAACP story, and quotes a commenter as saying: "The difference between the tea party and the naacp is if you are looking for racists at the tea party you look at the fringe and if you are looking for racists at the naacp you look to the stage." As Glenn says, "Ouch."

Thank God for Britain, a truly post-racial democracy just across the pond. They're so post-racial that a black couple can give birth to a white child! That guy certainly has some solid trust in his wife, because I'd be ordering up paternity tests if I were him. Sounds like a sweet guy, if not naive and I'm sure he'll be a good father to that little cracker. Raise her well, cause when she grows up you can use her to get you out of tickets and use her to talk to the cops!

STAAAAAMOSSSSSSS!!!! The best hair of the 90's gets the Letterman treatment, but wins the case and remains a g-d among men. If only I weren't in the military, I could grow a beastly mullet like Uncle Jesse... It's hard to deal with my short hair when at every crossroads, I ask myself, What Would Uncle Jesse Do?

Go Navy, suck it Air Force (Sorry elder bro, you know I love you even though you're an air-warrior)! The first bit is an animation, but the second half of this 30 second clip shows actual footage of the Navy humping a drone in the face. Who said the AF gets all the cool toys? So what if they get queen sized massage beds in the barracks, we've got frikkin lazers.

Chinese sexy homeless man to get his own bio-pic. I find the story to be a little bit unremarkable; if you're going to be a rags-to-riches epic, you should either be that Will Smith movie where he pursues happiness or Eddie Murphy and Dan Akroyd in that switcheroo movie. This guy just looks like a hipster who abandoned his family, who in turn sadly died while he was gone. I guess Hollywood has really run out of ideas (and roman numerals to add to the Land Before Time franchise). I guess kids got tired of Peetwees lisp and that retarded stegasaurus, Spike.

Now, on the advice of several other bloggers, I'm going to post a picture of a very attractive, half-naked woman in a shameless bid to increase my traffic. Let's see what a google search of "very attractive half-naked woman" yields...

Booyah! 'Mrrkin flag and everything, that is pure 'Mrrrka my friends. Take that, you freedom hating archaeologists. If you don't like that picture, you're a holocaust denier!

Rocky Gives the Best Abortions

At 8:32AM PST this morning, I received two texts from my sister: "I've just coined a term based on 2 pot smokin long haired old hippies I just saw driving a BMW convertable," reads the first one. "And I think it applies to many other people, especially in NY, San Fran and Al Gore: Hippycrite." Hilarious, I'm ashamed I didn't think of it first, as I have a long history of making up great words (example: Anthetic; Hub; Business Casual). Little did I know at the time that I would have a great opportunity to use her text as a segue into a blogpost! Today's prime hippycrite (unsurprisingly) is our dear Madam Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, with the awesome headline from Ed Morrissey: "We need partial birth abortions for Jesus, or something." Money quote:

"When conservatives talk about religious values informing public policy goals, the Left shrieks about the separation of church and state and usually refers to the Right as an American Taliban. Pelosi will get a pass, however, because she uses the religious language to argue for their pet causes. It’s a good idea to capture this moment anyway, for the next time someone argues that “Christianists” are attempting a theocratic takeover of America." 

Damned theocrats! Let the record show that I am firmly in support of the separation of church and state, generally oppose those who try to legislate morality, and I'm simply pointing out the double standard. When I say I oppose those who would legislate morality, I don't mean that I oppose religious people per say, only those who would legislate based on their religious moral codes (another reason to <3 Chris Christie). Also let the record show that while I'm pro-choice, partial-birth abortions are disgusting. It could easily be avoided by simply throwing the relevant pregnant woman down a long flight of stairs; famous example of this strategy shown below:

 

While still vaguely on the topic of Ed Morrissey and brilliant headlines: "AQ's #3 Applies for his 72 Virgins." Ed was on a roll today, and that literally made me bust out laughing. It was the first I had heard of news that we got AQ's #3 man, so I hoped to provide a funny way to break the news to those who haven't yet heard about this. Ed's colleague Allahpundit also provided a bit of laughter for me, albeit not straight off the bat with his headline. Money quote:

"Is the world’s submersibles industry so bereft of talent that James Cameron is the go-to guy when a national crisis in the deep sea erupts? This is like NASA announcing that they’ve detected a killer asteroid on course for Earth and Obama immediately dialing up Michael Bay."

Allah never fails to amuse, and he hit the nail right on the head there with that one. James Cameron being a big fag and taking himself super serially is one thing, but the fact that our government takes him super serial is a little frightening. Next thing you know, they're calling in Dog the Bounty Hunter to take out Bin Laden. Hmm... not a bad idea, good job Reed!

American liberal bloggers Ezra Klein and Matt Yglesias are either divorced from reality or willfully ignorant: China's forced relocation projects are totally sweet (h/t: Instaglenn). Since I tend to know a little bit about China, I felt compelled to respond to this. The article mentions the millions of Beijingers forced to move for the olympics (typical Chinese stage management), but doesn't even hit the tip of the iceberg. Millions more were forced to move from their homes to accommodate the Three Gorges Dam project, in some cases without any sort of compensation at all (including funds which were embezzled by local officials, according to wiki). This must be the sort of progress for which Tom Friedman incessantly lauds China. Never heard of the tyranny of the majority I guess. We're not talking about eminent domain here, we're talking millions of people being displaced. Useful idiots...

I mentioned the Israeli flotilla incident a little bit yesterday, and have been reading about it for the better part of the day. My take is that the Israeli troops were justified in self-defense when it got to that point, but that it never should have gotten there in the first place. Israel should have known better than to fall into that PR trap, and now they will suffer for it. Big kudos to Obama and the U.S. representatives in the U.N. for standing up for Israel though, they seemed to divert a disastrous U.N. resolution that would have further isolated Israel in the international community and opened the floodgates for more anti-semitism and hate. This article via George Friedman is my choice of reading material for anybody who wants to look into this matter.

Also related, Professor Jacobson of Cornell Law proposed, "How about a convoy to Turkey?" He states:

"Turkey has repressed its large Kurdish minority, which seeks a nation of its own, and has threatened to invade Iraqi Kurdistan if it gained too much autonomy. Turkey, in turn, has been subjected to attacks from Kurdish separatist groups, and has responded harshly. The attacks on Turkey pale in comparison to attacks against Israel. Unlike Israel, the survival of Turkey and Turks is not threatened... Since Turkey now has thrust itself into the forefront of making sure Hamas can be resupplied by Iran from the sea, I presume Turkey will open its borders to shipments to Kurdish separatist groups, without inspecting those shipments for weapons."

Point well taken Professor, unfortunately logic and reason don't come into play when any Israeli conflict pops up. As we often say in the military, perception is reality; Israeli never gets credit for exercising restraint, and should have anticipated the headlines that would result from this incident. The situation should have been handled much better (before the idea to send the troops on board with paintball guns was put into action). Those on the flotilla were ready to provoke the response, and they got the headlines that they wanted; ultimately, it doesn't matter whether Israel was right or wrong.

Now for the roundup of the miscellaneous... Guatemalans are going to hell! I guess that would make Mexico hell's sphincter, the portal through which people must cross to get out of hell and into the U.S. Maybe this analogy isn't very good, so now for something completely different.

Take THAT, Airbud, you little bitch (or was he male, I don't remember). Lassie, suck it, there's a new big dog in town. Watch the video to have your mind blown by the world's coolest dog.

It's a Melting Pot, Not a Multi-Course Meal

Yesterday I wrote about divisive ethnic studies courses and one of my links wrote about Arizona's attempt to change the way ethnic studies courses are conducted. Here is a pretty thorough and reasonable defense of a law that sounds a bit extreme on first look. When I eat food, I don't like to mix the different food groups together; for example I don't like the steak to touch the potatoes or the green beans, and I pay special attention to keep them separate and distinct. I take a bite of the steak and then I take a bite of the green beans, but I never eat them together in the same bite. It's not a perfect analogy, but I liken this way of dining to the way ethnic studies courses encourage ethnic solidarity and animosity towards others who may be perceived as oppressors. This country was formerly known as a melting pot, where different cultures came together, mixed, and assimilated to American life. I honestly don't know if one way is more correct than another, but I was under the impression this place was supposed to be a melting pot where American identity was emphasized, not a multi-course meal where people are pigeon-holed into their respective 弱势团体 (oppressed groups). 

 Astonishing video account of an attack against Swedish cartoonist giving a presentation at a Swedish University, complete with English subtitles. I had seen a shorter version of the video a few days ago, but the full length one is much more compelling. I can't believe this takes place in a college, an institution where the exchange of ideas is supposed to take place. I implore you to watch the video to witness the barbarity displayed by the muslim protestors. Apparently there was also an attempt today to burn down his home. Now compare the cowardice of the school in shutting down the performance to the reaction of Comedy Central to threats. Our speech is increasingly being controlled and dictated by terror. Contrast all this with Comedy Central's anti-semitic online game and new series which will no doubt offend christians. I am not offended by either of these items, as I have a sense of humor and don't take these things seriously. What I am offended by is the fact that it's open season to shit on my religion, but even the slightest criticism of Islam is restricted. Maybe the healing between Islam and the West starts here at ground zero, where the damage was most severe. Quote:

"If the Japanese decided to open a cultural center across from Pearl Harbor, that would be insensitive," Sipos told me. "If the Germans opened a Bach choral society across from Auschwitz, even after all these years, that would be an insensitive setting. I have absolutely nothing against Islam. I just think: Why there?"

I was having a chat with my girlfriend today, and at some point learned that her landlord only rents to female tenants. I laughed, thinking she reserves that right as the landowner, and of course I understand why the landlord would have a policy like this. Females have a reputation for being neater, less rowdy, and more responsible in general with property that they're renting. Then I thought further, imagine a landlord that only would accept male tenants, and the lawsuits which would ensue. Now take it another step and imagine a landlord who only accepted white tenants. One might make the bigoted and misguided argument that since blacks commit more crime statistically, a landlord is justified in denying black tenants. There is no question that this is both illegal and immoral, so why is it any different to deny men from living somewhere? Obviously it sounds silly to complain about sexism towards males, but when you change the scenario, it becomes a lot clearer I think. The prejudice I shrugged off when I first heard of it sounds a lot worse when the aggrieved parties are women or minorities; in fact, I was guilty of anti-male prejudice myself, justifying her landlords position. I immediately thought about these statistics regarding the preponderance of females over males in higher education. Though I believe that correlation does not imply causation, these are troubling statistics, and maybe anti-male sexism isn't such a laughable though after all.

Then again, I haven't yet finished college (though I plan to) and maybe that's not such a bad thing. I know plenty of college graduates making way less than I do, and I know some that are in exactly my position (though not necessarily as good at their job as I am ;-) ). College isn't for everybody, just ask Bill Gates. You don't need to go to college to be successful, and according to our wonderful Speaker Mrs. Pelosi, you don't even need to be productive to survive anymore! Thanks for telling us how you really feel, Nancy. I'm glad my earned tax dollars are going to uphold somebody else's lifestyle who wants to pursue his or her passion. I'm just glad our huge government has so much competent oversight.

My father often likes to tell the story of how and when he knew my mom was the one he wanted to married. Here's the short version: My family has a long tradition of brand loyalty to Heinz Ketchup, which can be traced back to my grandfather. If I remember correctly, he once had a bottle of heinz that he thought tasted weird, so he wrote a letter to them and in response, they sent him a huge supply of ketchup. My father, taking after his father, smothers everything in ketchup, even a perfectly cooked ribeye (which is blasphemy in my book... blood is all the flavoring I need). My little brother used to eat Heinz out of a bowl with a spoon in his younger days. When my mom and dad started dating, they happened upon a time when they were out eating and for some reason, there was no heinz ketchup there. Luckily my mom, being the thrifty woman her mother raised her to be, had saved the little packets of Heinz ketchup that they give out at take-out restaurants in her pocketbook. My father often claims that this is when he knew that they would get married. I'm sure he'll be devastated to hear this news via Hotair. Nanny Bloomberg sure is a drag, on the other hand, he has been making moves to get rid of NYC's Rubber Rooms, which I was actually going to write about this week.

Via the Instaprophet, a fun little prank to play with your credit card company to make them your slave. Hilarious idea, but it's a lot more work than I'm willing to put in. Maybe I'll try it on a smaller scale.

I saw Kick-Ass the other day and it was indeed pretty kickass... and now I leave you with a hilarious video of local news (skip to 3:00 if you're lazy or strapped for time). The headline alone should make you laugh. (H/T: Hotair) Enjoy your saturday night!

Ferris Durden, Huge Bewbs, and Terrizts

Coolest analysis of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" evah! Spoilers ahead... (for both Ferris Bueller and Fight Club, but if you're reading this blog and haven't seen both those movies, stop now and go watch them)

Via Hotair, "Woman of the Year!" Bewbs so large they could crush her lungs... that's what I like to hear! Who needs lungs when you've got bewbs that big?

Newest Pew Poll released to depress this supporter of free market capitalism... It pains me to see my generation embrace socialism this way. As the saying goes, eventually you run out of other people's money. Can't wait til I can plug into the internet directly and live there as the administrator of my own personal server. You don't want to know what would go on there, trust me. People who's company I enjoy, when the time comes, make sure to back up a copy of yourself onto my server so we can continue to hang out.

And now for my daily outrageous outrage regarding terrizt attacks and the fucking insane and completely retarded responses that emanate from our elected officials and lovely members of the media. Yesterday I briefly mentioned Mayor Bloomberg's idiotic comments about who the suspected Times Square would-be-bomber might be. No, he's not a lone wolf. Yes, he's an islamic fundamentalist who has ties to terrizt groups in the Pakistan. From the way our officials put it, you'd think they're surprised that this is who is trying to kill us for the fourth time on American soil since Obama took office (Ft. Hood, success; Alabama recruitment station, success; underpants bomber, failure; Times Square, failure). Two successful jihadist attacks and two failures, both failures being cases where we got LUCKY that nobody was killed. This fucker was ON THE PLANE, which was taxiing by the way, when he got caught (with 2 others detained). Four are in police custody in Pakistan... that's a lot of Lone Wolfs with the same idea. I refer back to the article I linked to yesterday; we have a DEFINED enemy, and it's not boogeyman right-wing militia health-care opposing fascists.

The Washington Examiner's Mary Katherine Ham (haha, her name is Ham) has the roundup of the most idiotic responses to the terrizt attempt on saturday. Remarkable that the list is this complete after only a few days. Anybody who's been paying attention won't be surprised that the MSNBC reporter is disappointed that it wasn't a domestic terrizt. Let me point you to another related article by NRO's resident jooooooo Jonah Goldberg. My favorite line:

Homegrown, mentally deranged, doesn’t like the healthcare bill: These are the three best guesses of the mayor who works a few minutes from ground zero could come up with. To which I say, stick it up your memory hole Mayor. 

Some advice to Obama from Congress' most conservative joooo Eric Cantor. I think President Obama has already touched on this issue quite a bit, but drive the point home Mr. President, because it's a damn compelling one. And please, sir, keep these fuckers from blowing up my home.

Keep the Narrative

Great "Reed the Viking" news everybody! I am the number THREE search result for "3D Porn Address!" I figured this out after seeing somebody from Turkey was led to my blog via that particular search item. I truly swell with pride that my readership includes imaginative people like him/her (let's be real, him). While on the topic of technology, here's an interesting take on surveillance camera's and their potential role in stopping attacks like the attempt on saturday in New York's Times Square. On the one hand, it all sounds pretty 1984 to me, but on the other, if they're going to do it anyway, they might as well do it cheaply and efficiently. 

For those of you who haven't yet heard, the Times Square bombing attempt was orchestrated by right-wing, healthcare hating, tea party influenced radicals. Er, at least that's what Mayor Bloomberg would have you think. Keep it classy Mayor, keep it classy. Rather, keep the narrative and don't let facts get in the way. To date and to my knowledge, the tea party people haven't incited a single violent crime (if I'm mistaken, please let me know in the comments). On the other hand, radical leftists during May Day protests and immigration rallies actually HAVE gotten violent. I don't mean this as a defense of the tea party; rather I mean to denounce the rabid hypocrisy and double standard in the standard media narrative (yes, I say that at risk of sounding like a conspiracy theorist). If it's from the right, dissent is dangerous and totalitarian, but if it's from the left, it's people exercising their rights, even when it actually IS violent... from 2000-2008, dissent was patriotic, remember? Now it's irresponsible and a threat to the republic blah blah blah...

We've got to keep the narrative though... remember the Fort Hood massacre? I certainly do, and it struck a chord with me considering that my brother, many of my friends, and I am in the military. The fact the one of our own could kill the people they work with everyday and who they swore to protect bothers me at a very fundamental level. As Patrick Poole puts it:

Rather than acknowledge the proliferation of jihadist ideology and the threat it poses to our U.S.-based troops, these officials describe the problem as random, and ultimately unknowable, “violent extremism” (the favored term of the Obama administration). Pretending that the threat is random and unknowable gives them license to do nothing. The fact is that the jihadist threat can be precisely defined, studied, and identified. It is the ability to understand the ever-evolving problem and the will to do something about it that is sorely lacking.

Really good article, read the whole thing.

Honestly, it's no wonder why people don't trust the government. First the SEC wankin' it on the job, and now we got state senators checkin' out bewbs in the chamber. Can't say I wouldn't do the same, but I ain't runnin' for state senate now am I? Why people don't trust the U.N.: Iran elected to UN's Women's Rights Commission. For real?

Great, albeit long, read via the always awesome Michael Totten. For those who don't know, he's a free-lance reporter who has embedded with U.S. troops in Iraq. He seems generally non-partisan with no agenda, but always be wary of bias (including reading my blog). The article, written by a friend and colleague of Totten's, is a bit hawky, but it makes a lotta bit of sense to me. Doesn't really tell me anything I don't know, but I really like the way he puts it, and it does make a lot of sense.

I leave y'all with the NYT reporting on Chinglish as they call it, Engrish as Engrish.com calls it. Hope they don't bring it to a high profile; I don't know how I'll amuse myself all day without the treasures found on Engrish.com. From the site:

I must admit that being able to read the Chinese and understand it sometimes makes it less funny to me because I know what they want to say and where they made their mistake... Good thing the chinese is illegible in this one ;).