Universal Solution: Alcohol Cures Toe Infection

So I'm re-reading Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke because I haven't read it since freshman year of high school and I remember liking it a lot. I must say, despite being written in the 1950's, is still pretty relevant today. The Viking Summary without spoilers: Peaceful Alien Overlords come to Earth and usher in an age of peace and prosperity, where humans basically live to pursue knowledge and interests (although most choose to mindlessly consume television like sponges). All nations are dissolved and the human race is united (Clarke makes a point that Israel is not happy about this since they had been the most recent to get an independent state after working for hundreds of years for it). Obviously there's a LOT more to the novel, especially stuff I will not spoil for you, that's just a very basic introduction to the plot. The main idea is that, although everything seems to be pretty good, humans are banned from certain things "for their protection" in this ultimate nanny state, such as interstellar travel and space flight in general. They are also not permitted to speak to (with the exception of the U.N. SecGen) or even see the overlords for a long time. One thing that struck a chord with me today was that the Supervisor of Earth (an overlord) held a press conference with the human media and would not allow them to record it, though he recorded it himself. Sound familiar to you (hint: see yesterday's post about police and the law)? Sci-fi often has a libertarian streak to it, if you don't believe me just check out The Moon is a Harsh Mistress. Maybe that's why I like it? (Real reason: Inter-alien sex scenes... that green girl from the new Star Trek movie, wow).

Statism gone too far: State inspectors crack down on little girl's lemonade stand. You can't make this shit up. Next thing you know they'll be arresting good samaritans who are running a safe rides program for drunk people to cut down on drunk driving. This is normally where I'd attempt humor through my commentary, but honestly, the headlines speak for themselves. I guess I can say a naughty word to go for some laughs: Poop.

Glenn linked to this post by The Other McCain talking about a new scandal for North Dakota Governor and senatorial hopeful John Hoeven. Apparently, his Democrat opponents think it's a scandal that his daughter had modeling photos in a bikini. If that's a scandal to Mr. Hoeven, I can't imagine what he'd feel like if he was Lawrence Fishburne. For those too lazy to click the link, Lawrence Fishburne's daughter Montana decided to release a sex tape to boost her non-existant career. Glenn, myself and Mr. McCain all agree that the Republicans should have more scandals like this one. Maybe someday the Republicans can get the youth vote if they keep this up. I'll post the image here to help generate traffic while I'm at it, thanks Mr. McCain!

If you live in North Dakota, please vote for John Hoeven, if only just to keep him in the spotlight so we could possibly get some more of this. Thank you. Sincerely, Reed the Viking.

You know who is hot? Hermione. I found a new picture, so here it is:

WHAT THE FUCK? Who is that young man and what'd they do to Hermione? I am boycotting Harry Potter 7 parts one AND two for this bullshit. Hermione, if you wanted to become a lesbian who looks like a young man, you could have at least gone for the J.Biebz look and joined Lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber.com. Instead she's just gone all lesbians who look like the kid from Big Daddy. Seriously though, Hermione - It's about 10 years to late for you to audition for the part of Draco Malfoy, just give it up.

The Future: Wife Learns of Husband's Second Marriage Through Facebook. I try to feel bad for the woman, but she does sound really fucking stupid. She found out about the affair when her husband left the tell-tale signs, good work so far. She finds them in a hotel together and confronts them, telling the harlot that she's married to the man and they have kids. Then, from the article: "she confronted her husband. She says he told her he wouldn't actually go through with the wedding." And she ate it right up. It's kind of hard to feel bad for her. Now he's run away to Florida with the kids and the only time she sees them is on his facebook page with their new mum.

That's why you should stick to the booty call, which now apparently has scientific significance. In my experience (don't read this mom; dad, I hope this finally will make you proud of me), the booty call is more a side effect of alcohol or drought conditions, made at unreal times of the deep, dark night. A friends with benefits situation is more akin to what they speak of in the article, where, "The booty call relationship gives the guy easy access to sex, and gives the woman a steady partner.” I'd agree that FWB gives that steady partner, while a booty call can be very flakey and inconsisent, depending on how often the guy drinks or strikes out with other, more suitable mates. I guess scientists are like parents, and lag on the lingo. For some perspective, hollywood usually lags behind the curve by a few years, and Booty Call with Jamie Foxx came out over a decade ago.

Good dog, Lassie: Dog Bites Man... and saves his life. I don't know what's more incredible, the fact that he was drunk after only a 6 pack and 2 margaritas (lightweight!), or the fact that he was so drunk that he didn't feel the dog biting off his infected toe. Or the fact that he didn't seem to think it was a problem that his toe was infected to a life threatening degree. They say drinking alcohol impairs judgement, but what does it do to those who have no judgement to begin with? Although I do agree with his self-treatment plan. Alcohol is a sterilizer, and thus, kills bacteria. Drinking is most effective when you are sick, or at risk of falling ill. Realistically, cancer patients should be drinking and partying, not sitting around smoking weed like a bunch of hippies. Or at least they should smoke while they drink.

Exit question: Please let me know in the comments if you think I should continue my blog as I have been doing it, or write a couple posts throughout the day, each one devoted to it's own topic so that the blog is not all over the place talking about sex, robots, terrizm, space, and sex robots in space all in one post.