Mugatu: SHUT UP! Enough already, Ballstein! Who cares about Derek Zoolander anyway? The man has only one look, for Christ's sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They're the same face! Doesn't anybody notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills! I invented the piano key necktie, I invented it! What have you done, Derek? You've done nothing! NOTHIIIING! And I will be a monkey's uncle if I let you ruin this for me, because if you can't get the job done, then I will!
Zoolander is a movie that is an acquired taste but in looking for the above quote to capture the zeitgeist of the UN and Obama's appearance there, (ie, no one notices the lunacy that is right in front of their eyes; am I the only one taking crazy pills?) I noticed that it has a great deal to add to an understanding of the current world situation. For example, yesterday, President Obama gave a speech that was sophomoric and ultimately quite inconsequential. When your natural constituency finds you to come across as weak and ineffectual, it is certain evidence that the aura surrounding the President is fading. As per Zoolander, we have gone from Obama as Mugatu...
Maury Ballstein: Mugatu is so hot right now he could take a crap, wrap it in tinfoil, put a couple fish hooks on it and sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.
[Actually, that could either be a comment on the deification of Obama, or the current status of modern art, or a combination of the two, the NEA, with a dig at the iPod imbroglio thrown in.]
...to an Obama whose emptiness is beginning to become apparent. Note Hansel's comments about himself:
Hansel: I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot.
I suppose that is a bit of a stretch. Our President seems to have some beliefs (beyond the necessity of his accruing power, of course.) He has ingested a sophomore level understanding of how the world works (imperialism bad, people of color good, profits evil, oppressors bad, victims good, American exceptionalism bad, international solidarity good) and offers little evidence that he has grasped that such facile understandings belie the complexity of the world.
Following Obama's speech we were treated to an hour and a half oration from Muammar Qaddafi with an encore by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Once again Zoolander captured the essence of their world view in a scene with Matilda (journalist and love interest), Derek, and J.P Prewitt ("I'm a hand model, mama. A finger jockey. We think differently than the face and body boys... we're a different breed.")
J.P. Prewitt: The truth is male models have been assassinating world leaders for over 200 years. Abe Lincoln wanted to abolish slavery, right? Well, who do you think made the silk stockings and powdered wigs worn by our early leaders?
Derek Zoolander: Mugatu!
J.P. Prewitt: [pauses] Slaves, Derek. So they hired John Wilkes Booth to do Mr. Lincoln in. The first model/actor! Dallas. 1963. John F. Kennedy.
Matilda: Lee Harvey Oswald wasn't a male model.
J.P. Prewitt: You're goddamn right he wasn't, but the two lookers who capped Kennedy from the Grassy Knoll sure as shit were!
Finally, Zoolander captures the solipsism of the MSM:
Derek Zoolander: Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long so you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way?
Barack Obama does not like the idea that much of the world is an unfriendly place, He doesn't like the idea that the United States of America has been for a long time the only "Sheriff" in town. The fact is that I don't like that we are the Sheriff either. But if we do not enforce some minimal standards of behavior, who will? The UN? The UN is a farce that treats lunatics and tyrants like statesmen, that offers ovations to the rantings of a Qaddafi and treats Ahmadinejad like a legally elected head of state. The UN is composed of deep thinkers who nod their heads sagely when bizarre conspiracy theories are vomited out of the maws of the solons there.
Luckily, the UN is an edentulous carnivore, incapable of hurting anyone able to defend himself (though equally incapable of defending the helpless.) It is far too easy to make the UN look foolish; in fact, the UN delegates perform that function seamlessly unassisted. Of far greater concern is an American President who appears dedicated to making himself look foolish. Once Zoolander becomes a template for Obama, it becomes very difficult for him to regain the initiative. If I poke fun at Obama for acting in a clueless manner, that is of no consequence. When our enemies see him as clueless, the consequences will be real and painful.
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