Blogosphere Addictive Disorder

Since it is Superbowl Sunday, one of America's national holidays, I thought it would be a good time to "lighten up" and describe a new faux-problem.

As most people realize, the Psychiatric profession is always looking for more people who are victims of serious mental disorders.  In order to assist the American Psychiatric Association in their noble quest of finding at least one DSM diagnosis for everyone, I would like to describe the diagnostic criteria for a new Psychiatric problem that is already prevalent and threatening to become an epidemic.  I am, of course, speaking, with tongue held firmly in cheek, of Blogosphere Addictive Disorder or BAD.

BAD is a serious Psychiatric disturbance in which the sufferer begins to spend more and more time in the Blogosphere with often disastrous consequences in their "real life"; some victims have even missed meals because of BAD!  However, the worst danger to those who develop BAD is that, like any addiction, it can progress to a far more disabling disorder, Blogging Addictive Disorder, or WORSE.

Herewith are some of the diagnostic criteria for BAD:

You know you have it BAD when:

1) You have the RSS feed from Instapundit but not from the New York Times.

2) When you see the initials WTC, you think of Wretchard the Cat, not the World Trade Center.

3) Watching the Superbowl on Sunday, you can't figure out why the footballs aren't green; are the color settings off on your TV?

4) You aren't Catholic, but you not only know what an Anchoress is, but can't wait to see what she has to say about the Pope's most recent encyclical.

5) You overheard the news report about a downed Powerline and wondered if their site had been hacked.

6) Atlas Shrugs is a book?

7) Who are those three old men at SC & A?

8) Your home page is a site about Pajamas.

9) You are on a first name basis with Michelle, Roger, Rusty, Mac, and AJ and have never met any of them.

10) Your kids ask where MOM is and you give them the url.

11) Larwyn has you on her mailing list.

12) You know what happened in Vienna in 1683.

13) You know you have it BAD when it is Superbowl Sunday and you are on line reading blogs.

14) Worse, it is Superbowl Sunday and you are writing a blog post.

This is by no means an exhaustive list.   Any help from the Blogosphere in determining additional signs and symptoms of the disorder are welcome.  We must stop BAD before it becomes WORSE.

BAD and WORSE are insidious addictions that tend to worsen over time.  If you think you have BAD or WORSE, you should immediately contact Dr. Sanity and Neo-neocon to see if they have any appointments available.